Endorphins & Nano Gremlins

Painfully addictive, pain being the important word here, is what the glorious rush of endorphins is. I had almost forgotten the masochistic joy of pushing a tired body until it hurts and then pushing it that little further to ensure that post-exercise high.
It has reminded me that my attempts to exercise this year have been, up until last night, quite frankly a pathetic effort.
Until you push yourself you can't improve yourself.

So what was I doing last night to feed my addiction?
After being the unsuspecting victim of a sales pitch mugging while out doing a bit of shopping at the weekend I found myself arriving at a local sports centre for a free taster session. Preposterously, the martial art I chose to try is a modern one created in America, in Hollywood of all places, but I decided to give it a try regardless on the grounds that even Americans have to get it right sometimes.
So I entered the sports hall and lined up for a session of Defence Lab. It was structured, energetic and logical, and exhausting. Needless to say I will be going again next week. At long last I have discovered a replacement for the group that is now over a hundred miles away in a different county (difficult to attend but not impossible if you happen have too much money and time on your hands - sadly I am in short supply of both). It's only taken three attempts and some pretty hopeless excuses of martial arts clubs to find one that has potential to help me get fit and vaguely human again.

Unfortunately, endorphins attract nano-gremlins. Modern medicine dismisses them and blames toxic chemical build ups but I know the truth. The terrible pain that hobbles you after a hard training session, the stiffness that ages you by torturous decades, that's the nano gremlins. They are attracted by the smell of endorphins and sweat and once you're infected it can take days to shift them. All you can do is keep moving and do your best to force them out - they don't like muscles flexing, it squashes them.



For now it seems those soulless zombies are being held at bay, even they don't like nano-gremlins, I think they taste bad, and although it is contrary to reason apparently even zombies can get stomach ache. 
So that is the reason for the zombie explosion - so few people are exercising now the nano-gremlins that once held them at bay are becoming an endangered species and that delicate unnatural balance of nano-gremlin v zombie has been upset.
People of the world unite, train hard, play hard, work hard, give the nano-gremlins a home and drive the evil zombie hoard to extinction! Or at least chronic gastritis.


FraidyKat Runs from Zombies