Death by sodium deficiency

As I sit here I am dripping with sweat (sorry if that's a bit too much information but in the spirit of truth I write it so) I cannot help but reflect on my lack of consistency in my return to running.
Not just my inability to following my training schedule, that's par for course with my life, but my average run speed.
When I last ran (about 1 1/2 years ago) I did not have a smart phone and could not track my runs the way I can now so I don't know how consistent I really was.
.
.
.
Sorry about that. I just managed to escape to sanitise and rehydrate. Now perhaps I won't need to attack the salt shaker in the kitchen thanks to the Zero (High5) tablets in my water. Mild but tasty and I find them much easier to drink on the go than sugary concoctions like lucozade.

Memo: Hydration bladders work really well in the shower. Hang it on a hook and slurp your favourite tipple. - Inspiration came from watching Hawkeye Pierce in M*A*S*H using an IV line to drink moonshine gin in the shower.

Consistency,
Yes, that.
My last run was a very sedate 5mph average. I wasn't much in the zone and I was listening to The Goon Show, funny but not speed making.
This run I was peaking at 7mph and averaging closer to 6mph. I was listening to My Chemical Romance, a much more aggressive noise to run too, but it did really wear me out.
Needless to say, I need to get an even stride figured out to make sure I find a speed I can run steadily too. I'm looking for increasing my distance at the minute, not my speed.
Maybe I just need a more consistent beat to run to, or maybe I should stop blaming the music and start listening to my body.

Starting to run is not easy. We may have evolved to do it but we still have to train for - and if it's easy you're trying hard enough!

It's amazing how many burger vans can be present at a market. Today I was out and about and I think every other stall was either a burger van ora cake stall. Surely they can't all make money, there aren't enough people eating enough calories to get the profits in. So what's promoting them to all turn up? 
Maybe they are under the employ of the diet industry. All that fat being pushed on you, all that processed meat and white flour carbs, it's a recipe for weight gain and we know who profits from that... The Diet Industry.
It's a conspiracy!
The diet fairies who look all pretty and nice while they dispense their pills and plans in exchange for your pennies are giving backhanders to the daemons in fast food industry. They are both fleecing us for our hard earned money, every pound we put on and then every pound we take off is pounds in their bank accounts.
Break the fairies, shun the daemons!

FraidyKat Runs - Away from Fairies

Toy time

Is a Christmas present still a Christmas present when you get it in March?
I am assured that it is.
So what is this (very belated) Christmas present? Something I discovered last year and announced that I really really wanted, despite the cost, in the hope of ending an age old running (and cycling) problem.

Like a vast number of other Nano-gremlin infected, adrenalin and endorphin addicts I exercise better to music. A good beat is tonic, it infuses extra strength and stamina, it keeps you going faster and further that you would in silence. And when all else fails a long run can be anything but monotonous if you happen to be listening to an episode of The Goon Show - any oldy but a goody, if you've never listened to this classic you're missing sooo much gut busting amusement.

Anyway, the main problem with moving to the beat is that you must either be massively anti-social and share your twisted taste in noise with the whole world as you broadcast your playlist through the air or you shut yourself off from the world with headphone making you completely oblivious to your surroundings.
If you're running on a treadmill in the gym then the in ear option is a no brainer (gym standard issue sounds of tacky mtv repeats and the skinny girls gossiping by the water fountain has never appealed to me) but if you're outside it's another matter.

Why you shouldn't hide from the world when outside:

• If you're by the road, you need to know where the cars are (or tractors on narrow lanes)
• If you're in the park, a dog ambush is bad enough when you hear it coming but an unexpected terrier flying at your ankles can really smart.
• If you're on the tow path, you need to hear the psycho cyclist racing up behind you intent on throwing you into the canal and into the path of the angry swan (it's no urban myth, angry swans are not to be trifled with).
• If you're in the dark and running alone, well, I don't need to paint a picture with all the lone female runner horror stories about.

But then why shouldn't you have some beats to listen to as you go? The quandary is a tough one.

Then I heard about bone conducting headphones and they seemed like the perfect answer.
They sit in front of your ears on your cheek bones and conduct the sound vibrations through the bone to your ears. You can hear your beats and you can still hear everything else around you. How fab is that?

I did loads of research and settled on AfterShokz.
I still need to do a long test with them but a short one confirms I will be running with them.
Pros: Clear music and clear background noise (a comfortable chat with my partner while listening to Pink was easily accomplished). They're just like normal headphones for weight and feel without the sore ears of in ear headphones. The model I have got also acts as a hands-free for my phone.
Cons: The music is audible from the outside - like old '80s walkman headphones, tinny but quiet no problem if you are just passing. You have to remember to charge them, but there is supposed to be a twelve hour battery life and it's a standard microUSB port. (You can get bluetooth wirefree ones but their battery life is half that at best). They are expensive, at best £60 for these ones but you do get a two year warranty with them.

As a noise addict I have opted for an expensive solution to getting my music on the move and I know there are purists out there who will be screaming at me for not taking in the sounds of nature as I run but on balance I don't think I'm missing much - sheep aren't big on intellectual conversation and crops are just fertiliser bores. As for bird song, you do realise that pretty singing is just a load of yelling to the tune of "have sex with me" and "go away this is my patch"! (mating and territory, pretty much like humans in town really).


I want to go walking along the canal but the narrow boats are growling. This is a bad time of the year for them, they've been in hibernation all winter and they're eager to get back on the waterway but it's still too cold for most of their owners. Frisky narrow boats are a little known danger of the canals but they have to be strong, they were bred as a beast of burden and they need to be able to defend themselves from swans and sunken trolleys.
Beware the little ones most of all, anything under 30feet and they have inadequacy issues.


FraidyKat Runs - for beats
Fast day